Turns Out I Was the Hot One?

Whilst our explanations of the concept of a ‘retard’ has been documented at length, our blog subtitle of ‘Turns Out I Was The Hot One’ has thus far been left swaying there, lonely in the wind and devoid of context.

I assure you, it springs not from an arrogant concept of self worth, but to a discussion L and I shared regarding a notion we coined the “Relationship Ledger”. Like an accounting balance sheet, this ledger resembled a set of scales, in which each side represented one party to the relationship. Weight was added for perceived positive attributes each person brought to the relationship, whilst negative weights could be placed for factors which were detrimental to the relationship.

Our theory was that a successful relationship was dependent upon equal contribution from each party, and that we could objectively determine our position in any engagement by reference to the scale.

However, an issue arose in the fact that these ‘attributes’ were indeed subjective and hence the scale was a faulty model.

Examples?

Well I considered ambition. At age 22, the world is supposedly my oyster. I have plans, dreams and hopes. My challenge is making these ambitions possibilities. Hence as a reasonably ambitious individual, I naturally seek a partner who shares the recognition that it is important to seek out what makes you happy and a path to this goal.

However, I recently learnt there is such a thing as too much ambition. A recent liaison with a delightful musician illustrated that it is possible to pursue aspirations to the detriment of all other aspects of life. Whilst I was content with being second in line to his musical dreams, I was not satisfied with being a relative non-entity.

Similarly, early on in a relationship way back in 2005, my partner expressed he was so attracted to my intelligence, and musical passions. It is here where I have to contradict Jack Ladder. After it emerged that my final year high school marks were higher than his, and that his position as ‘the smart one’ in the relationship was not concrete, he was not so impressed. Further contention arose when he also realised my musical sensibilities were more finely tuned than his.

Sorry Jack, but it seems that physicality could compare to our brainy affair. At least a partner with ‘legs up to here’ has a leg to stand on in the relationship.

So it seemed that our scale was destined to fail. We still remained none the wiser in our quest to understand the delicate balance which represented successful relationships.

And in the meantime, we drank the last dregs of red wine from our glasses we had previously clinked to signify a failed relationship of mine, and counselled ourselves in the fact that at least I was still ‘the hot one’. And that folks, is how blogs are born.